If I have learned anything in my 27 years, I have learned that marriage will be one of the most challenging and rewarding aspects of living life. Four years ago I committed myself to my partner in crime, my better half and my best friend. I am extremely lucky that I have found that one person who will be there for me for the rest of my life and with every day we live together, I feel I learn something new about myself and our relationship. Although I don’t consider myself an expert on the subject of relationships, in my young life I think I have successfully discovered top successful key points to being in a happy, healthy relationship. From my humble mind to your willing ears, I hope that these tips can help you succeed in any relationship that you have in your life.
Relationships. That is a funny word that people tend to feel mixed emotions towards, some fear it while others crave it. What is a relationship? Well, to easily define it would be as the connection between two subjects. That is how I would describe it and to make it even plainer, it is a connection. So, what are ways to make a connection between two subjects better or even work at all? It all starts with Loyalty, that feeling that you get with a person that makes you want to stick up for them in a fight or support them at all costs. With loyalty comes trust and to trust someone you have to start by being honest. That is the first key to successful relationships: Honesty. Telling the truth will save everyone much trouble, from the first date to the first meeting. Some people lie about their college educations, careers or even lifestyles but when you are honest you, weed out people who are bad for you to find those that are better fit for you and the kind of relationship you seek. Now this brings up the matter of not only being honest with your partner but being honest with yourself. When you are honest about who you are and what you want, you will find people who support you as who are. When you put an image out into the universe, the universe will return what you put out. So make sure it is a perception of what you really want, cause you just might get it. (insert suspenseful music here)
Once you have worked on those honest muscles, then comes the next key to successful relationships: Communication. Relationships that have an open line of communication allows for a life without secrets and doubts. Which again brings back that sneaky topic of honesty. It is the very fabric of successful relationships because there is no questioning what the other person might be thinking when communication lines are open. When in doubt, talk about it because negativity can kill the relationship from the inside out if it is not hashed out. Some of my favorite memories of being with my husband are nights that we spend just talking about life, goals, daily thoughts or ideas. Being new parents has given us fewer chances to have to each other but when we do have time to talk, if feels like we have conversations that allow us to learn more about each other and the type of people that we are growing into.
The beauty about relationships is the concept of two different people joining into a single team. Whether it is a husband and wife, employee and boss or father and daughter it is always two groups of people to join and make a relationship that has to work together. Sometimes one person wants something different from the other and they need to work out their differences this is what we call the next key of successful relationships: Compromise. In order to reach success, both parties will need to compromise for one another along with the always important need to have a healthy amount of compromise where both people experience equal gains and losses. There will be times when one person thinks something is right or needed while the other thinks it is not and there will be times when you might have to discuss what is best for the relationship and not what is best for the person as an individual. That is, yet another example how honesty and communication will come in handy for the result will be two happy people who will be working together to better the relationship.
Life has many routines and try as you might your relationships tends to fall into them. Sometimes its nice and comforting to have stability in your relationships but there are times when you are with a person for a long time that you feel a bit bored. It is not at the fault of the other person nor is it anyone’s fault at all, it is more of the fact that there are times when we as human beings need something to stir up the pot of life. That is why the fourth key to a successful relationship is: Spontaneity. When it comes to being spontaneous, I am not saying to just show up one day with a sports car in the garage and airline tickets to Bali (although that would be nice), I am more wanting to encourage a spontaneous action or two with the routine of life that you lead and with your relationship. We love to live life and to be in a relationship or more specifically in a marriage, means that we are living the life we love with the person that we love. What a great achievement to live that kind of life even though we are always wanting to shake up the routine from time to time. Instead of spending Friday night with your other married friends at the local bar, maybe this Friday you two will go see a movie together instead. Another example might be one that most parents can relate to, with kids running the lives of the couple it can be difficult to spend quality time with each other. Sometimes adding a dash of romance to the routine with a nice dinner, in a fancy black-tie restaurant and no kids around can help shake up the routine. Mostly it is best to have fun with your significant other because you are in fact spending your life with the person you care most about in the world. So why wouldn’t you want to have fun with them?
We can learn so much from a successful relationship and by using these tips we can do great things in our relationships and in life. We are honest, we talk and listen to others, we can compromise in a healthy way and we know how to have fun. Yet with all of those great things that bring us success, there is still one thing that we still need in this mix to really create the best relationship that you could have. You. The last and not at all the very least key to a successful relationship is: Individuality. Without knowing who you are you can’t allow truth in the relationship because you will constantly hold yourself back. Even though being in a successful relationship is a wondrous thing, to have that individuality is important too. It creates time for you to learn something new, or become great at a new hobby. Time to yourself helps allow your partner to enjoy time with you and can give new and interesting things for you two to learn about each other.
With these keys I believe that anyone looking to find themselves in a successful relationship can make it by following these tips as well as and most importantly, your gut instinct. Let me know in the comments below if you think these are good tips, also I’d love to hear what you think are some of your important keys to a successful relationship!